Cost of Silence

Staying hush-hush about your money? Staying quiet can cost you. But we’re here to let you know that by simply having a natter about it, you might save yourself some dosh.

Believe it or not, people in the UK lose £1,600 every year on average by avoiding awkward money conversations.

*Source: OnePoll survey, commissioned by Nest, of 2,000 UK adults, October 2026

The good news? A conversation could make a difference. We commissioned research into the hidden cost of staying silent about money and partnered with Vicky Reynal, financial psychotherapist and author of Money on Your Mind, to help tackle these tricky conversations.

How to get talking

Thinking about money is one thing. Talking about it is another.

"Money silence can be costly, but the reason why people often choose it is the fear of feeling ashamed or judged” “But most often, clients tell me, what they find when they ask is not judgement but answers, relief and the beginning of a virtuous cycle of building financial confidence."

Vicky Reynal

Financial Psychotherapist

1. Stop nodding along

Our research revealed three in ten (30%) have pretended to understand a financial term rather than admit they didn't. "Our inner critic tells us we should already know, but many people find money confusing," says Vicky. "Next time, ask the salesperson, broker or provider to explain it in plain English. You can say “I want to make sure I really understand this” and see it as an act of self-care: after all, you’ll be the one paying the price if you misunderstand. It should get easier every time if you make a habit of asking for things to be clarified."

2. Be the one who goes first

Almost half of Brits (49%) say they'd feel more comfortable talking about money if someone else raised it. So be the one who enables others to speak up. Start with a low-stakes financial question and choose someone you feel safe talking to. You might ask whether or how your friends go about budgeting, or which savings account they use.

3. Book a 15-minute money date

Small slip-ups could quietly add up, from paying for the same streaming service twice to forgetting to cancel a free trial. Set aside 15 minutes with your partner or housemate to list every recurring payment, who pays it and which card it comes from. Moving things from a “vague understanding” to “on-paper clarity” could decrease not just your costs, but your financial anxiety too.

It all adds up

Staying quiet about money doesn’t always mean one big financial mistake. Most of the time, it’s everyday stuff that slips through because nobody said anything. Have you ever:

paid full price when a friend had a discount code you could have used?
forgotten to cancel a free trial and then found a surprise bill?
done a quick shop on the way home, to get home and find someone had already popped out to buy the same?
made a decision about your pension without talking it through first?

Sound familiar? You’re far from alone. In fact, 34% of people we surveyed said that talking things through with someone helped them avoid a costly money mistake.

We also discovered that after opening up about financial decisions, 41% felt relieved and 25% wished they had brought it up sooner. 41% also felt more control in their money.

Need more than a chat?

Talking to those around you is a great place to start – but they’re unlikely to have all the answers. As a pension provider, we’re not allowed to provide you with financial advice. However, there are several free resources that could be useful.

Pension Wise

The Pension Wise service from MoneyHelper offers impartial personal guidance if you're aged 50 or over and have defined contribution savings, such as a Nest pension.

MoneyHelper

MoneyHelper is a free service set up by the government to make your money and pension choices clearer. It aims to cut through the jargon and complexity of financial services, explaining what you need to do and how you do it. It can help with impartial guidance and can recommend further, trusted support if you need it.

Citizens Advice

This service provides independent, confidential and impartial advice to anyone who needs it on their rights and responsibilities across a range of topics.

Want to understand your pension better?

You can explore our guidance and advice pages for helpful information about your Nest pension and planning for retirement

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